Friday, February 8, 2013

Tangled Dilemma

update: just wanted to make clear...I'm fully aware that Rapunzel was kidnapped. My point was to say that an adopted child could take that storyline and make a connection to her adoption, viewing us as the kidnappers and her birth parents as add the king and queen. She will be told over and over in our house how much we love her and how awesome adoption is, but she will still hear negative things about adoption from the world, and the last thing I want is for her to see me as mother gothel. Does that make more sense? :)
It is no secret that I love Disney.
Tangled didn't disappoint when I first saw it. But, a dilemma presented itself immediately.
First of all, as a mom, the whole "mother knows best" song kind of under minds our authority. You know? Showing girls that mother really doesn't know best.
Also, Rapunzel is disobedient and sneaks out of her house, knowing she is not supposed to. While I fully support her leaving since she was kidnapped and being hidden... it is still not a great message for our daughters, right?
Those two issues I have not really struggled with- this one I have:
Immediately I saw this as a negative view of adoption. I could see adopted kiddos seeing themselves as Rapunzel, their mommies as Mother Gothel, and their birth parents as the king and queen.
I know I cannot be the only one who sees this, right?
I had full intentions of keeping Annie away from Tangled. But, I caved and let her watch it. Of course, like the rest of us, she loves it.
But, I don't know if I will be letting her watch it when she is older. I can foresee at time when I keep it from her for a few years.
There are enough negative messages about adoption that she will witness over time- we come in contact with them every time we leave the house.
Now, obviously we are not hiding her adoption from her- it is kinda impossible to do so seeing our skin colors! lol
But, I would never hide it from her anyway. We are so proud of her adoption, and we want her to be too. We celebrate her Gotcha Day and her Adoption Day yearly. Believe me, she will know how awesome being adopted is!
But, that doesn't mean she will not come in contact with the negatives, and as her mommy I want to protect her in anyway I can. This may seem silly to some, but I will do anything I can to protect her and keep her happy.
Other adoptive parents: what is your view of Tangled? 


  1. I don't know anything about the adoption angle...she wasnt adopted, she was kidnapped. Big difference. We did watch it and used it to tell the girls to always fight if someone is trying to take them, and it is okay to run away from a mean person. However, we don't watch it anymore, b/c we don't like the "mean mommy" in it. The same reason we don't do Cinderella, or any of the other princess movies. There is just too much evil in them and, in all honesty don't want them desensitized to that. No judgements on how y'all do movie choices with Annie, this is just our view on them. Love Les

  2. I'm not a parent, but wanted to write a comment anyways. Rapunzel was not adopted, she was kidnapped (by an evil witch). There is a big difference there. I think if you explained the difference to her, it will be more clear.