Wednesday, October 31, 2012

A Decade

I am 10 years old! 

I was born again a decade ago.
I was raised in the Catholic church.  I went to church every Sunday and CCE every Wednesday. It was just what you did.  I never questioned the existence of God or anything, but it was just church. Other than Wednesday and Sunday, God was not a part of my life.
When I was about 12 my uncle was saved and he convinced my grandmother to leave the Catholic church. The Catholic church preaches salvation by works, they worship Mary, etc. Not bibilical, God honoring, or good.
Naturally we left too, but we didn't attend another church.
I always said when I was 16 and could drive, I would go to church by myself. I had a desire to attend church- it was more of a moral thing I think.
Then when I was 16 I began dating a boy, and he and his family attended church every Sunday.  Just what I was looking for.
For the first time, I actually sat through a real sermon and not a tradition filled event that happened to quote 2 scriptures during the whole shebang. I was blown away that I was learning about God. It was not just church, it was more!
Somewhere in late October 2002, I trusted Christ as my Savior.  On a night sometime after that, my BF's mom asked if I had ever done the sinners prayer, and I said no, but I was saved.  She lead me through it anyway, and congratulated me on my salvation.  I knew I was already saved at this point, but it was still nice. 
God got hold of me hard and I began changing immediately. 
My BF and I looked into engagement rings, (yes I was only 16, I know, but we did). His family was on board- dating is for marriage after all.  I had dreamed my entire life of being married and starting a family.  My dreams were coming true!
But something wasn't right. Even though I loved him and his family, I knew he was not the one God had created me to marry.  My first big act of obedience to my God was to break off this relationship.  After almost a year together, and engagement ring talk/shopping, I was single.
Then I was 17 and a senior in high school. I was single for the first time in my entire life, (seriously, I had a BF even in preschool. I was NEVER single).
Though I did not attend church this year, nor did I read my Bible really, God grew me so so much. I spent a lot of time with my Christian aunt and uncle and her parents.  Everytime we were together I asked them countless questions about my Savior.  They were church for me that year. That and worship music.  I listened to nothing else. :)
When I was about to start college, my friend invited me to her church. You see, I had no idea which church to go to my senior year, and I did not want to go alone so I just didn't go.
I went to her church and it just felt right.  I went back the next Sunday alone because her BF, (now husband), and chosen a different church. Now I was attending alone and it was oh so right.
A month later I was baptized. When I was saved 2 years prior I didn't understand why I needed to be baptized since I was baptized as a baby. Baby baptism in pointless.  Baptism is an outward expression of an inward change. A baby is not saved, and therefore does not need to be baptized. Baptism does not save- trust in Jesus saves.
I was a happy member of Cornerstone Community Bible Church.
I was still single, but a year later I became restless and began dating guys, knowing they were not right for me. Dating is for marriage!
But I had been so used to being in a relationship, and I so desired marriage, that I grew impatient.
Finally in 2006, despite my disobedience, God blessed me with what I had so been yearning for.
I was told by numerous people that my standards were too high and I needed to lower them.  Well, when I found Paul, he didn't just meet my standards, he exceeded them!
I lived at home for college and it was hard to try to break away as an adult when I was still viewed as a child.  We met in April and if I had lived away from home we would have married that June.  But, we did not, obviously. :) 
That October my sister was killed in a car accident. The next couple days I neither slept nor ate. Until about the third day, God calmed my spirit. You see, I wasn't sure if Tracie was in Heaven. Contrary to popular belief, being a good person will not get you into Heaven. You must give your life to Christ to enter into Heaven. Period. I wasn't sure if she had done that. So three days later, God revealed to me that she had in fact given her life to Him, and she was with Him in Heaven. God does not lie, so I knew she was in Heaven. After that I was able to eat, sleep, and function much better.
Knowing where I would spend eternity and that she was there too, was very comforting to me. I learned through this whole experience that Jesus was my Prince of Peace.  He IS the Prince of Peace, but I met Him as my Prince of Peace. After this experience I knew nothing this life could throw at me could separate me from His love and peace.

A tragedy that usually pushed people away from God brought me closer to Him.

6 months later Paul and I were married, and we have spent our married life serving the Lord along side each other.

My biggest act of obedience was in 2008 when I felt God telling me to forgo trying to get pregnant and just pursue adoption.  It was a hard pill to swallow, but when I did, it was easy to be obedient.

Looking back at the last 10 years, I see immense growth, but I have a lot more growth to do. I am so thankful that God chose to save me.  It was nothing I did- it was all Him!

Here's hoping that the next decade will prove to be even more God honoring than this one!

In this next decade, I pray that Paul and I grow closer together and we serve God even more than we have. I pray that God allows me to work for the orphan in the ways I feel He is leading me.  And most importantly, I pray Annie comes to know Jesus as her Savior in this next decade. I pray for that every night, and I also pray that she lives radically for Him, always!


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  2. You have officially lost me as a reader. How dare you call out a branch of Christianity as not "good" and " not biblical" ? How do you get off as condemning brothers and sisters in Christ? While you obviously felt called to join a different church, you should NEVER disrespect any religion. Especially one who believes in the same God as you do. Sure the tenants of faith differ between branches, but you come across as judgmental and condemning against anyone who believes in a different way of worshipping the same God. You should embrace your brothers and sisters in Christ, not push them away. I've read your blog for a while now and I've prayed for you and your family. While I will still pray for y'all, I'm going to pray for your heart and that you can find a true sense of the meaning of God's love.

  3. I do not wish your lose you as a reader, and I greatly appreciate your reading and praying us.

    I said that the Catholic church's belief in works based salvation, baby baptism for salvation, and the worship of Mary are unbiblical practices. If one does not acknowledge Jesus' sacrifice on the cross as the only means of salvation, then they reject Jesus.

    Now I do believe there are some catholics that are believers and therefore are my brothers and sisters in Christ.

    I do have a problem with the Catholic church- they are teaching against scripture and against Jesus.

    But, I never said there are no believers in the Catholic church.